What are some of the things that remind you of Christmas? Hanging lights with Dad? Picking out the perfect tree and decorating it while you drink hot cocoa? Mom’s sugar cookies? Aunt Sherry’s Christmas Eve Party? Chances are good that the activity that brings back the fondest holiday memories is one that your family repeated every year. It was a tradition – an inherited, established, or customary pattern of thought, action, or behavior, according to Merriam-Webster.
Megan Cox, a traditions expert from Princeton, NJ, explains the importance of family traditions in her book “The Book of New Family Traditions: How to Create Great Rituals for Holidays & Everyday”. Her extensive research shows that traditions provide a sense of comfort, security, stability and identity for families, all of which help children form deeper connections with their families. But, if you are new to this parenting thing, starting family traditions can seem daunting. We want it to be fun, memorable and meaningful but how do we start?
Some things to keep in mind when considering traditions for your family:
1. Keep it simple. A tradition does not have to be over-the-top to be memorable.
2. Make sure it fits within your family dynamic and priorities. You can use a classic family tradition but be sure to give it your own unique family spin.
3. Be flexible and supportive. Your spouse may have a tradition that is a dear memory and would fit into your family’s holiday. Although you may not find value in it that does not mean that it isn’t valuable.
4. As your children get older talk to them about what they like to do at the holidays. You might be surprised by the things that they now consider to be a family tradition.
5. Consider why you want to start or maintain a tradition. Don’t do it simply because you did it as a kid or because “it’s what you do at Christmas-time”. If it’s causing added stress, is awkward for your family or gives very little holiday cheer then perhaps it’s time to find a new tradition.
6. Keep it fun and engaging. It is important to be aware of the age-appropriateness of an activity before implementing it. Your tradition will have a short lifespan if you do not involve your children and teach them how to carry it on.
Perhaps you’d like to start family traditions but you aren’t sure where to begin. Look through magazines, online articles or ask friends for suggestions of traditions that their families hold dear. Choose a few that sound like a good match for your family and try them out. Some will work, some won’t and some will need a little bit of tweaking to get it just right but you won’t know until your family tries them on for size. Here are few ideas to point you in the right direction:
- Allow each family member to open a gift on Christmas Eve
- Make a special breakfast on Christmas morning
- Give everyone Christmas pajamas to wear for the holidays
- Make a ritual out of picking your Christmas tree – go to the same place, eat cookies while decorating, cut a fresh tree at a farm
- Make a different kind of cookie each week before Christmas; allow each family member to choose their favorite recipe
- Make crafts for residents at a nursing home
- Choose a family in need to support for Christmas
- Buy or make each family member a special ornament
- Eat a fun Christmas Eve dinner – some like to make a Mexican or Chinese Christmas meal instead of traditional fare
- Ask each family member which food says “Christmas” to them and be sure to include it each year at the Christmas meal
- Attend a Christmas Eve church service
If you have some fun Christmas traditions, please let us know in the Comments section. You might just give another reader a good idea for their family! Remember, the traditions you choose are not as important as the memories you make. Keep traditions simple, flexible and fun so that your family can experience many tidings of comfort and joy this Christmas.
